Blog 6: “In the Dark”

In episode 3 of Angel, “In the Dark,” Angel is presented with the Gem of Amarra. His fellow vampire Spike found it back in Sunnydale, where Buffy the Vampire Slayer is set. Buffy managed to get a hold of it and had a mutual friend make the delivery. With the Gem of Amarra a vampire is not only immortal, but invincible. It allows them to walk out in the daylight and nothing can kill them, not even a wooden stake through the heart. You might think that this would make any vampire ecstatic. Angel however, did not seem very excited about it. He actually took the ring straight down to the sewers and hid it away.

My first thought was, “For the love of God man, put the ring on and go see the sun shine for the first time in hundreds of years!” When he instead buried the ring down in the sewers, I was puzzled. Then I realized he must feel undeserving of such freedom and the happiness it would bring to him. Sometimes in life we will receive something and feel like we don’t deserve it or that it’s too lavish of a gift. The difference is that I know very few people who would react in the way Angel did. Who would turn away from such a wonderful opportunity? For example, if you got a job offer you felt someone else was better qualified for would you turn it down? What if a relative left you a lump sum of money, would you feel unworthy? Or what if you got a grade you thought was too good to be true? Would you tell the instructor, “Thanks but no thanks, I didn’t work hard enough to earn such a high mark.”?

I can almost guarantee that most everyone would take the job, the money, and the grade. They would tell themselves it was a wonderful opportunity, fortune smiling upon them, good karma, luck, etc. At the end of the episode Angel destroys the ring completely. Could you and would you do the same?